Tuesday, December 8, 2009

How to become The World's Most Annoying Etsy Member.


Wooden sign by Mojo

Interested? Just follow these simple rules. Thank you assortedgoodies for posting this at the forums. I could always use a good laugh on an otherwise stressful, holiday order catching evening. I can think of a few people I've encountered who are in the runnings for #6 and #7!

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If you want to become the World’s Most Annoying Etsy Member just pick a few of the following and practice them on a daily basis:

1) Use the forums to whine about how you hate this or hate that. Or about how you are smarter than everyone else. To make it even better; use bad language and then turn around and ask for sympathy, pity and sales.

2) Convo someone to ask for their supply sources. Etsy people are very nice and they don’t mind giving you their secret sources so you can become their biggest competitor.

3) If you have already done this (#2) and someone has been nice enough to share their sources or secrets with you, don’t go back and say “Thank you”. What for? It is not like they did anything nice, is it?

4) Demand feedback, or complain about those who don’t leave feedback, especially publicly in the forums. Who cares that feedback is optional?

5) Copy someone's pictures, design or description then use them to sell your own stuff. So what if it is illegal, don’t take your own pictures if someone else has gone to the trouble of producing a wonderful picture, just use theirs. (no, seriously, it is illegal!)

6) Convo the seller of your favorite item asking how they made it so you can make your own instead of using the Techniques section of the forums to ask if anyone out there has a tutorial available or would be willing to share some tips. And if they don’t reply, just keep convo-ing, eventually they will get tired of it and they will reply.

7) Contact a non-supply seller asking them if they could sell you that "thingy" they use to make that neat item cause you want to make your own. So what if they don’t have that "thingy" listed for sale in their shop. I’m sure they would rather sell their stock to you than use it to complete their own orders.

8) Contact everyone that hearted YOUR item to tell them it is on sale or that you have others in different colors.

9) Assume that because someone bought something from you they want to be on your mailing list. Then send them tons and tons of unsolicited newsletters and emails. So what if they could use the RSS feed to keep them updated to changes in your shop.

10) Make your Convos as confusing as possible. Each time you reply to a message start a NEW convo instead of replying to the original convo. This way they have to navigate to different pages and open up countless convos instead of having them all neatly in one page. Anyway, they can read your mind and they know exactly what you mean, right?

11) Ask a seller to waive the shipping fee and send you their item for free, or better yet ask them to discount the price and send you a bonus item free. Anyway, they get this stuff for free, it’s not like they take any time gathering supplies, making the item by hand, packaging and shipping, right?

I’m sure that practicing these things daily will win you the title of World’s Most Annoying Etsy Member.

3 comments:

  1. seriously? people do this? WOW. that is so sad. I'm glad you keep on being the nice Etsy seller you are despite dealing with these crazies!

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  2. hahaha.. those are hilarious! i needed a good chuckle this morning. ;)

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  3. hahaha. I laughed a few times! Thankfully, I've only had to deal with a couple of those so far, but i've only been around etsy since august. haha.

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